Walk into any store where meat is not sold.
Grab an item for purchase and bring it to the register.
Once the salesperson has rung you up, feign surprise that you have lost your wallet
and begin frantically patting down the pockets of your pants and jacket.
Start reaching inside of these pockets – jeans first and then jacket – and start pulling out slabs, chunks, hunks and handfuls of raw meat.
A small t-bone steak, filet mignon, veal patties, beef cubes and the like are recommended for pants pockets. A large handful of ground beef is recommended for jacket pocket.
After emptying your pockets, begin to pat down your socks/ankles.
You can pull any type of meat you desire out of your socks, but you MUST pull out a raw chicken leg AND a whole fish out of opposite socks, consecutively, as the finale.
Note bene: For the purpose of this dance, fish is meat.
Leave the checkout area by saying”“Maybe I left my wallet it in the car.”
Do not return.
